|
When you read these things, they instantly seem foolish, don’t they?
For instance, on what authority, we have to ask ourselves, do we KNOW that if X rejected us, Y & Z will follow suit? We fear that will be the case, and we may suspect it will be so. But by no means is it conclusive, until we make it that way by failing to keep trying.
Likewise, on what basis can we assert that today’s rejection will recur tomorrow?
When I was a salesperson, working my way through college, I contacted a fellow who LOUDLY rejected my offer, to say the least. Actually, he got unhinged and declared, “Never contact me, again!”
I remember this episode vividly, because it was so exceptional. Anyway, the very next day, by mistake, I phoned him. (Apparently, I forgot to strike his name from my list.) My error only became apparent to me after I got him on the line and asked him how he was.
At that second, I thought, “Oops!” To my surprise, he replied, “I’m fine.”
I had no choice but to continue with my sales spiel, fully expecting him to reject me, even more loudly and emphatically, at any moment. Imagine how shocked I was to ask him for his order and to hear him cheerfully respond with, “Okay!”
He bought from me, the very day after telling me to never contact him again!
Please believe me when I tell you it was a mistake that I had called him back. Given how poorly the first call went, I was in no mood for a repeat performance. But by erring in this way, I accidentally proved the point that rejection isn’t necessarily permanent. Today’s no can even be a precursor, and a necessary one, to tomorrow’s yes, if we only get our minds around the concept.
This story also demonstrates that rejection isn’t necessarily personal. The day before, when this guy bit my head off, he was probably overwhelmed by something that had nothing to do with me. Yet, when many of us are being spurned, our impulse is to blame ourselves and to feel sullied by the overall experience. We feel awful, and beat ourselves down before the next person can do it to us.
So, what can we do to conquer rejection and to actually learn to invite it?
Four things:
(1)Tell yourself it is isolated;
(2)Tell yourself it is temporary; and
(3)Tell yourself it doesn’t pertain to you, personally. In other words they may be rejecting your idea or offer, but they aren’t rejecting YOU.
(4)Prove these truths by actively seeking more rejections. If you hope to publish that novel or to get that screenplay into the right hands, send them out more widely. Give more people the chance to say no!
This is one of the great secrets of the Law of Large Numbers. Do more of anything, and you’ll make success inevitable!
Dr. Gary S. Goodman is a popular keynote speaker, consultant, and seminar leader and the best-selling author of 12 books. He is the author of the Nightingale-Conant audio program, The Law Of Large Numbers: How To Make Success Inevitable. Gary teaches Entrepreneurship and Consulting at UCLA Extension, and he is President of Customersatisfaction.com and The Goodman Organization. When he isn’t being rejected, he can usually be found in Glendale, California, where he makes his home. He can be reached at gary@customersatisfaction.com.
About the Author
Best-selling author of 12 books, Dr. Gary S. Goodman is a top-rated seminar leader at UCLA and 40 universities. He specializes in customer service, sales, and communication consulting. He can be reached at: gary@customersatisfaction.com.
Back
|
